Dare
by Pterobat
Summary: Some loose ends are tied up, as Exedore gets a new occupation and chooses a home, while the Zentraedi future marches onward. Takes place directly after “O Green World” and concludes the Exedore Quartet.
1. Chapter 1

**Dare**

**Chapter 1**

Everyone in the nearly-empty senate tiers turned to watch me enter, but I was quite used to being stared at, and did not care.

"Exedore Formo," began the Tirolian Prime Minister, part of the new democratic government run by unaltered natural-borns. "Is it true that you have recently been in contact with Kazianna Hesh, warrior of the remaining Zentraedi forces?"

"That is correct, Eminence."

"And what do you know of Yaita Deparra?"

It was a name that I had not heard in a very long time. "Yaita Deparra was the aide to the female Zentraedi fleet, a non-combatant like myself. She left the ranks shortly before Azonia's post-Dolza defection, convinced that her commander was going mad from a form of culture shock.

"Yaita intended to report the possibility of betrayal to the Earth forces, but she was unable to do so before it occurred. After this, Yaita answered questions for the Humans, but I never spoke with her directly, and she never took any high place within the Human government. I consider her but a contemporary."

The Prime Minister acknowledged this with only a slight inclination of his head. "So you were unaware that she has recently been elected as co-leader of the remaining Zentraedi, and sent a recent transmission to inform us of that fact?"

I concealed my surprise. "Eminence, I was not aware; remember that I have just returned to Tirol. All signs seemed to suggest that Kazianna Hesh would be taking up the sole leadership role."

"Emissary Exedore, discounting your own investment in its success, what odds would you give the Zentraedi of evolving into a versatile civilian society?"

"I would rate their chances quite highly, Eminence. Once committed to a task, Zentraedi shall follow things through to the best of their ability."

"And so you do not believe there is any danger that the Zentraedi might try to conquer and assimilate Tirol?"

"You know that they have fought strongly for the Robotech Expeditionary Force, and if they intended to betray, they would have had many more opportunities before this."

"Can you guarantee this?"

Here it was, then. "I am not the one to ask. I am perpetually Micronized, have lived apart from other Zentraedi for over a decade. I encourage you to engage them yourself and discover that there is nothing to fear. There has been enough strife between Micronian clone and natural-born without adding my people into it."

He did not address this, instead saying, "Finally, Yaita has requested that you and your 'mate' make a journey to Fantoma as soon as possible. She would not specify the nature of the visit."

I straightened my back. "I shall undertake this, if Eminences would permit me." The Tirolians still technically owned Fantoma, after all.

"We grant it," replied the Prime Minister. "And we expect a report on your observations, especially on their children; some of us are very interested in knowing if the Humans' tales were true."

Was that mirth I detected, subtly rippling through them? "I understand."

"Dismissed, Exedore."

I executed a small bow and walked back out of the formerly Royal Hall, not stopping until I returned to my residence.

--

Lantas and I had lived in the same room for several years: one of the highest ones in the largest intact building in Tiresia, an edifice which the clones had adopted as their own. They, and their allied natural-borns, had eventually become more dispersed, but many still called it home, and so did some of their children, whether hybrid or full-blood.

After our shuttle had landed, Cabell and several of our other friends had been at the port, telling me that the Prime Minister wished to see me promptly, but first I had carried my returned possessions to the apartments, boxes that had until recently been on the SDF-3: papers, books, clothing, and pictures. I had not elected to take all the items back to Tirol, leaving some at my house near Pike Base.

Lantas was still inside, surrounded by several books and pictures, which she'd obviously just been looking at, not putting away, knowing that both of us had specific ideas about where we wanted our things to be placed.

Though when on Earth she still enjoyed wearing odd mixtures of Human clothing, on Tirol she now dressed standardly, and favoured a short-sleeved magenta bodysuit with an orange cape and boots.

Perched atop Lantas' head was the great foam cap, covered in now-peeling rubber, representing one of the few times I had let myself give into desultory impulses, bedazzled by the strange re-imagining of myself in a film.

That was not the only reason I paused in the doorway, however, and I did not move even after she looked up, started, and gently took it off, placing on the covers behind her. "So, what is it that they want?"

I ventured in and sat down next to her, twining my hands in my lap. "They appear to be cautious about this entire affair. I have no doubt fear of the Zentraedi plays as much a role as the desire for reduced strife."

I also told her about Yaita, and the request that had been made. There were only a few seconds while Lantas digested this. "We'd better go soon, then."

I nodded. Secretly I wanted for a chance to settle longer, to inform my friends, perhaps over dinner or a visit, of what had transpired. But sending a message through the communications network, telling them that such things would have to wait, was to suffice. Things were not yet finished.

--

We met the Zentraedi aboard the reclaimed _Valivarre_, though not at the same place where I had last seen Breetai. Yet it was fairly similar: large and empty and equipped with a balcony.

I took a quick mental count, and confirmed that every living Zentraedi was present save for Miriya, and this included their offspring. All of them stood quietly, as if waiting for something.

The adults wore uniforms or off-duty jumpsuits, still the only clothing that they had. But that clothing had been modified: a few females had cut their uniforms to show the skirt-like remains of coattails, while others of both genders had made other cuts, reduced their sleeves, wore patches of different shades on their uniforms. Of the capes and cowls, some were slung or tied differently than before, as togas, headbands, or sashes, and sported by those whose former rank should not have allowed them.

Kazianna and indeed Yaita Deparra stood at their head. Both wore black and red uniforms, for the highest of female rank. Yaita's accompanying cape had been refolded to resemble a female non-combatant cowl, though with a Zentraedi badge pinned to its front.

Yaita's left sleeve swung empty, and she was using a piece of old piping as a cane. Her neck and face were laced with scars, though not enough to warrant an eyepatch or protective cybernetic mask. She wore her remaining hair in a tail over one shoulder, secured with a row of rings, bangs smoothed back but for a few stray strands.

"You didn't have to come so quickly," Yaita said, without honorific or preamble, but also without haste.

I bent to the side, in order to indicate I was looking to the small crowd behind her. "This situation could become very delicate, and if there is something important to tell me, you need wait no longer."

"Then I will not. Exedore Formo, we request that you take up emissary duties again, and become Fantoma's representative to Tirol and whatever planetary federation might arise."

My mouth fell open. Instantly I recognized this as unseemly and closed it, all before Yaita finished speaking. "And how could I possibly do that?"

She abruptly winced. Yaita's injuries must have been severe, a non-combatant (physically flawed, like all those of our classification were, although Yaita's flaws were only internal) going into battle against Invid; her survival was astonishing.

"You don't remember the Contact Satellite? It will be simple enough to get it running again."

"Ah. Yes. My apologies for not recalling."

"As well as your physical difficulties, we recognize the life you are now leading, and intend to give you as much time as you need to deal in it. Believe me that if there were anyone else here who was qualified, we would have selected them.

"We need the help of other species to overcome certain resource problems that Fantoma has, and we haven't yet exhausted the supply of knowledge that the other worlds have to offer. You have had the most direct experience in the emissary role, and are also still in fairly good standing with the Humans and the Tirolians, or so Kazianna tells me."

I only looked at her. Behind me, Lantas said, "And that is why you invited me, isn't it?"

Yaita only nodded, a tiny motion. "What is it that you want to say?"

Lantas stepped forward. "Only that you can guess what I want. But I've always been aware of what Exedore is. If he takes your offer, I won't weep and cling. I can see the importance."

Kazianna's face twisted into an annoyed, dubious expression, while Yaita grinned, not seeing Kazianna's look.

Abruptly I imagined Yaita rubbing at Lantas' head with her fingertip, saying something condescending, such as, _Good girl_. It was not a pleasant image.

"You aren't obligated to give us an answer right now, Exedore, but please give it serious consideration," was all Yaita said next.

"There is something else," I added. "Tirol's Prime Minister wished that I would bring back observations on our peoples' status here, and he emphasized your offspring. It is obvious what he means; the new government is far more conservative on matters of the extraordinary."

Yaita scowled. "This is why I refused to inform your 'Prime Minister' before you. I knew there might be difficulties even after all this time. But if he wants us to share things, then I will give you statements to take back."

"I've brought a portable recorder," Lantas told her. "You can speak directly."

Yaita grinned again, and I thought those same disparaging thoughts about how she looked at Lantas. _Clever little thing, Exedore. Wherever did you find her?_ Why did such ideas occur to me?

Yaita explained how she had come to be co-commander: she had volunteered when serious discussion had begun about how to approach the construction of a new civilization, using her education as a non-combatant to justify her new prominence.

The overall plans remained the same as what Kazianna had spoken of, though now were described in more detail, with much more solidity and newer ambitions. Yaita re-introduced the children, emphasized that they had some mental enhancements but were very agreeable creatures. She left out the glowing eyes, which I had never even seen happen.

--

When Lantas and I were out of the hearing range of the others, she said, "If I gave the impression that I was indifferent about your accepting Yaita's offer, it was false. I don't want you to leave, but I cannot control your choice, and would not break down in public."

"Oh, it's...quite all right. I _am_ feeling rather stunned."

"Who wouldn't be affected by this?" She rubbed at my shoulder. "They're your people."

"Yes, but it is more...complicated."

"I know."

This would have been easier if we were of a different sort of temperament, one which would simply have said that our present relationship made Yaita's request impossible. But the memories of duty and loyalty still existed, and I...

"Lantas."

"Not now. You can have time to consider this."

"Many factors_ do _need to be considered, but it is already becoming too much to endure without comment."

She stopped and turned to me, as I continued speaking. "I would not ever doubt that you would understand and respect me if I chose some approximation of my previous life. But the fact would remain that I selected the old over the new, and you would eventually find another consort." It was that word which she preferred, rather than "mate", and I had fallen into the habit of using it. "Which you are always free to do, but do I wish to contribute?"

"I value your candour," she said, dryly. But Lantas' expression instantly softened. "And you're probably right." She cursed softly. "It would have been easier if we were the 'emotional' sort, wouldn't it? I could have just said, 'no'." She looked up at the enormous tunnel that led to the shuttle. "I was fine with your being needed on Earth for all that time, but with the SDF-3 returned, the future is clearer now."

The choice that was ambiguous just months ago had at last been made. "It is you that I wish for; it is Tirol." Though Tirol had hardly lived up to its refined, elegant image, it was still more technologically advanced and less damaged than Earth. "Yet...when I am asked to help my people, I cannot entirely shirk the responsibility."

--

This time, there was only Kazianna and Yaita to see me. I had announced by interplanetary communications that I had made my decision, but had wanted to articulate it to them directly.

Looking up at the two leaders, I wavered for a moment, almost swaying upon my feet. But, "I am suggesting a compromise."

"Compromise?" echoed Yaita, who drew back slightly.

"I have changed far too much to ever be able to settle on Fantoma. What I instead offer is to help _teach_ you. How to make negotiations, how to understand a history that took place before you were created, how to plan for a civilization using all of our experiences. I do not know everything, but shall provide what I can.

"It will be you who put that knowledge into practice. I shall come every day for teaching but will not take up any kind of permanent residence."

Yaita leaned on her cane. "This is because of that Micronian clone you mated with, isn't it?"

Her tone was not accusing, in fact I could not read it. "It is for far more than that. I know that I would still be respected; Breetai once asked me to join him in the rebellion against General Edwards. Yet how far can respect go when I must be carried upon your shoulder? Especially when there will eventually be no more living Zentraedi who have experienced my original stature."

Yaita turned laboriously to face away from me. "You do know what you are, don't you?"

"I am the _Domillan_." The honorific, which I had loosely translated to the Humans as Minister of Affairs, in fact encompassed my age, enhanced lifespan, status as the first Zentraedi made, and all aspects of my education and occupation. "But it does not mean that I am so essential that I must remain here or risk chaos."

Yaita scoffed, still not facing me. Kazianna looked between us, perhaps confused.

Yaita said, "In an Earth culture, you would have been disdained and bullied for being more intelligent than the average soldier. Yet among us you were revered." Yaita turned suddenly, but stopped in mid-whirl and began coughing. Kazianna hurried over and tried to offer physical support, but Yaita shrugged it off.

She completed the movement and faced me again, scowling now. "But It's more than mere past reverence. All Zentraedi are non-combatants now, but you and I are the only cowl-wearers left. It has always been our duty to put everything of ourselves into our work, to compensate for being born both flawed and unique.

"We have the education to help shape this world, and it needs much of that. No other society has been asked to start when its members are sentient but have been deprived of culture."

"I am aware of this, and intend to do everything in my power to aid this development. But I can only go so far; I ask you to allow me this."

"You're _demanding_ a great deal."

"I do not believe so. It is obvious that my physical nature and my experiences preclude a simple placement on one world. Even Tirol will never entirely accept me."

"What are you doing, Yaita?" Kazianna snapped. "You claimed that you intended to respect Exedore's other life, and but now you're berating him for choosing it. Didn't you realize this was a possibility right from the beginning? Or did you expect a ten-year development to become a side dish overnight?"

Kazianna gripped the other female's remaining arm, despite Yaita's grimace. "Don't throw away this opportunity when we still have much to learn from him. Exedore will not let us down."

"Then why are you coming back?" Yaita asked, calm again. "Why are you making any effort at all, if you are so convinced you no longer belong, and actually don't wish to?"

"For the same reason that I struggled with your request: new loyalties do not erase old ones, and the past can never be forgotten. I wish to remain close to my people, and help them prove that they are more than toys."

Yaita inhaled slowly. "Very well, Exedore, if that is what you want, we will further discuss your proposal, and you may wait here for our choice."

Even though that was not a standard protocol, I complied, and was left on the balcony while the two females departed to another section. I had no chronometer, and tried to occupy myself with contemplations, but was unable to focus on anything but their possible decision. From where I sat, I could hear nothing.

Kazianna and Yaita at last returned, and I made certain to turn and face them with dignity, concealing my eagerness to know their answer.

"We have decided to accept your offer," Yaita said. It sounded rather grudging, but of course I knew why.

Kazianna, however, only smiled. "Exedore...I had a feeling that you would choose something like this. There's no need to argue from pure logic anymore."

"Oh, but there always is," I replied to her, mildly. "My character has not been that radically changed, and I cannot expect others to accept my emotional perspective as a broader justification."

Kazianna only smiled wider.

"Another request has been made," I told them. "The Tirolians wish for a delegation of Zentraedi to make planetfall, so that you may make your intentions clear."

--

It was raining when I exited the small shuttle. Lantas was the only one there to greet me, capeless and carrying a Tiresian umbrella, a simple black hemisphere covered in veins of false gilt.

It shielded us as I went to pay the second part of the fee for using the shuttle. The woman at the booth thanked me, but I paid little attention to her.

On other days we preferred walking, but today we arranged for a city-transport, which resembled a trackless, hovering bullet train. No one in the seats noticed us, quite used to the sight of the two artificial beings together.

Lantas shut the umbrella, and put it across her knees. "What happened?"

After I had told her, she said, "And why would Yaita act like that? Didn't she see it was a possibility from the start?"

"I suspect that she wants to do everything in her power to build a future, and wishes to envelop everyone within that desire.

"The effects of Azonia's betrayal may also still linger; Yaita was quite concerned as to how that incident made the rest of the females look, even if Azonia was essentially fallen. Perhaps Yaita even feels there is a taint left from her own clone-sibling's actions." As strange as that latter would be, it was not impossible for a Zentraedi of this age to develop such a viewpoint, to suddenly feel a connection to their clone-siblings.

Lantas nodded. "But if Yaita can't even handle the complexity of your request, the civilization might be doomed."

I said nothing, only watched Fantoma's green sphere moving by outside the window. Lantas soon reached over to press the stop-request button on the window frame.

We stepped out into the rain again, and I looked up at the buildings, blurred by the greyness, though was far more concerned with not getting wet.

In the apartment, the images had been the first of the returned items to go up. They were the subjects one would expect: of the Friendly Five in various combinations, a long photograph of the main players in the Hayes-Hunter wedding, pictures of my Tirolian friends, of Lantas. There were also images taken during the exploratory tour.

I stared at them, but the heavy, chastised feeling would not leave, no matter how much I tried to banish it with rational understanding. None could truly anticipate pain; one only was able to move constantly ahead of it.

In time, reality would reassert itself. My choice had allowed me to fulfill all of my duties, and was more than I should have to hoped for.

Lantas made us tea. I felt the pleasant humming sensation in my chest and neck from the calming (but harmless) plants she had put into the liquid.

We sat in chairs, across from each other. After a few moments, she walked over to mine and kissed me lightly. What had once left me terrified now was very pleasant. It had taken a long time for us to reach the point of treating it so casually, Lantas also carrying burdens from her previous life.

"Thank you," she said.

I was feeling a trifle unfocused, and so needlessly asked, "For what?" Even knowing how it had been before, I gently tugged her into my lap; a bit absurd, when she was four inches taller than I was.

"Don't tell me that you don't understand." She slung one arm about my shoulders. "Part of your loyalty is always going to lie there. Yet you chose me."

"It is ever worth the effort," I replied, though there was still yet a twinge. "W-Were I forced to make a selection, it would have been this, and no other."

She would not have tolerated a placating lie, a statement that I had cased thinking of my Zentraedi loyalties when in actuality had not. It was fine to admit such a thing, instead of believing we should discard everything but ourselves.

I settled myself further into the chair and began to stroke her hip, while Lantas drank more of her tea.

Many would have laughed to see me in such a pose, but I had stopped worrying whether such emotions were characteristic of me, stopped fearing that sensation of being so soft and vulnerable, and the rushes of feeling that were so intense that they were almost frightening.

The Human ideal was apparently "opposites attract", but my new experiences enhanced my old inclinations instead of inhibiting them, as I became more interested in finding knowledge for my own wishes, especially now that I had someone to share it with so closely.

"We find passion in our own way," was a favourite expression of Lantas', a rebuttal to those who asked why we weren't interested in public displays of affection, and seemed to spend more time talking about science than anything. I could see it on her face again.

But sometimes, the standard expressions worked very well, once one had gotten used to them.

I clicked the belt shut, and then adjusted my collar a second time, before taking another full look. The sight was still somewhat strange, even comical, but it existed.

Instead of a cowl, the uniform had a standard striped collar, and its only badge was a Zentraedi emblem on the left side of the chest. In addition to being belted, the green piping was slightly different in layout, and there were other minor alterations to the colour scheme. Still, the nature of its representation could not be mistaken.

It was exactly what I had requested: a miniature, modified version of my Zentraedi uniform. I would wear it only on the Fantoma satellite or at official functions, and today would be its first test.

I left the bedroom, but instantly stopped walking when I saw Lantas. When I had gone in to change, she had been wearing some lower-class Tirolian clothes, a blue tunic and leggings. Now it was a sleeveless grey dress with an orange and red sash over the left shoulder, a black one at the waist. Elbow-length yellow gloves and leathery brown shoes completed it. The only thing different was the two white bracelets she had taken to wearing on her right wrist.

Lantas smiled, but spoke without teasing. "Think of it as a gesture of solidarity. It seemed to suit me more than a toga."

Her original clone garments, which she had not worn for years. "What of the memories?"

Lantas adjusted her shoulder-sash. "They still exist." She pointed at me, but smiled. "_Y__ou_ haven't worn clothes like that in even longer, and arguably the connotations are worse." She tapped one shoe against the carpet. "These will have to be reinforced, now that they're meant for extended movement."

We took the city-transport to a nearby plaza. Already a small crowd had gathered, but my garb was enough to allow me through, though of course there were some Tirolians who glowered when they saw me. Again, it was something that had gone on for so long that it was trifling.

Lantas disappeared into the crowd and I continued to walk towards the platform, waiting. There were stairs pushed up to it, but I had to take another way to the top.

None of the crowd gasped or screamed when the faint thundering footsteps came from the direction of the spaceport. But many in the front did tense perceptibly, and tilt their heads back to take their first direct sight of natural-stature Zentraedi.

Yaita crouched down and let me step onto her palm. I was placed on the platform, sitting in a low, puffed chair opposite the Tirolian senators. The natural-sized Zentraedi all remained standing, and I sat within their shadows.

Yaita repeated the same plans that I had placed before the Senate: The Zentraedi wanted Fantoma to be considered theirs, but also to be Tirol's ally, and to have aid from it and the other worlds. The Zentraedi would pay for this aid through profits gained from future extended participation in mining and industry, though in some cases barter might also be employed.

Talks went on for quite a long time. I could give little input because of my position in the new order (the Revered Ancient Minister of History and Education), and it wasn't very often that Yaita leaned in to ask me for advice. She had obviously picked up some tricks of her own when around Humans, and this made me smile discreetly.


	2. Chapter 2

**Dare**

**Chapter 2**

Thus the Tirol/Fantoma alliance was re-formed along those lines, and Tirolians and Zentraedi eventually went to Earth to inform the Humans of what had transpired. Lantas and I "hitched a ride" as it were, because I needed to close off my governmental ties to that planet, turn in my uniform and its copies, and relinquish my house near Pike Base, taking the rest of my belongings back to Tirol.

In the process, I also visited the Sterlings. They lived in a large but isolated house near a growing city, which they had already moved into by the time I left. Aurora still lived with them, but Dana had gone on to join a group called the Crazy Eights.

The Hunters were visiting the same day that Lantas and I were, and we all sat together in the living room, talking. Their Roy was outside (From where I sat, I could see that he was making a toy glider fly without touching it), but Aurora was sitting inside on a hassock, watching us.

I had brought some images of Fantoma and the Zentraedi, and told them about what my people were doing, and my part within it.

"Well, that's going to be the final touch," Lisa told me. "I keep telling them that I needed closure on the Zentraedi before I can finish _Recollections_, and they never seem to listen." She tilted her head and re-inspected the pictures. "Drannin really does look like Breetai, doesn't he?"

"It is true, yes. Before I would have thought you were merely echoing a Terran cliché, but it...seems to be correct in this case."

"Does he every ask you about Breetai?"

"Sometimes, yes."

Miriya: "How are they in general? The Zentraedi children, I mean?"

"They are showing a considerable curiosity, which is heartening. They seem to act normal, as near as I am able judge such things, but they seem to _know_ a great deal more, as they show when you ask them the right questions."

Max: "Yeah, the human kids are pretty much the same."

Miriya asked if an unspecified "they" were planning to do anything with the Zentraedi children.

"None of the adult Zentraedi appear to have any anguish about the thing; they are too concerned with learning how to raise them, and building a society, to even consider rejecting or fearing them for not being adequately 'normal'. And the children themselves do seem to act standardly, as I have just said.

"The Tirolians are more ambivalent, but can no longer ask me to make secret reports on them, which I have never done, and shall never do."

"Sounds like you're getting pretty protective of them," Max remarked, smiling.

I blinked, suddenly feeling unbalanced. "Ah, w-well, I do not think it satisfies any thwarted paternal urges."

Lisa suddenly snorted laughter. She waved one hand as she tried to get herself under control. "I'm sorry." She sniffled. "It's just the way that you put it... You've always been so _blunt_."

Instead of continuing this, I said, "We are not going to treat them as a new sort of super-race."

"Are you sure about that? It's a new beginning for all of us."

It was Lantas who responded to her. "And that's very true. But if you spend so much time looking at your Messianic glow, you will forget to see the realities that always need to be addressed. The children still have the same needs as any other."

"I'm different," Aurora spoke up, and everyone looked to her. She was leaning farther forward than she had been.

"Of course you are." I tilted my head to one side. "Why are you not playing with Roy? This cannot be the best entertainment for you."

"Because I have something to tell you, but Mother thinks that I have to wait until she and Father discuss something similar."

"And what would that be?" I directed the last question to Max and Miriya. From the way Rick and Lisa looked at the Sterlings, it was news to them as well.

"We're considering running for ambassadorship to Tirol/Fantoma," was Miriya's answer.

I stared. "You? Well, that is, er, quite surprising."

Miriya smirked. "Is it? You saw how we've 'gone soft', haven't you?"

"Well, yes." I stretched out the last word as I spoke. "But it is still quite unexpected. Emissaries..."

"Well, what's one more surprise?" Miriya was now grinning fully. "Besides, I've always wanted to see my homeworld--as much as I can. I'll even bring the girls."

"You should visit the old Tirolian laboratories," Lantas added, and Miriya nodded.

Rick: "I gotta say Max, I never thought I'd see you sitting in the political chair."

"You can keep your politics." Lisa yawned. "I'm not ready to retire just yet, but I'm not getting into that again."

"Amen to it," Rick added, though he looked strangely pensive.

"I'm going to run for Interworld Council."

All we adults were looking at Aurora again. Lantas scratched her neck. "You'd be forbidden, because of your age."

"I will," Aurora said. "I won't do anything special. I will simply run, and might win."

When I looked to Lantas, she had an odd, quirked expression on her face, which did not disappear as she said, "It looks like we can't stop you. But why do you want to restrict yourself so early?"

"It's something I have to do," Aurora replied. "I'm glad the others want to lead different lives, but this is my choice. I realize that you feel squeamish around children, especially ones like me, but it's simply how it will happen."

"Uh..."

Max leaned back. "Dana's got some issues with it. She told us that we've got to keep an eye on Roy and Aurora, and not put them in the spotlight or send them to any 'creeps'. But...Aurora volunteers anyway. Nobody's been able to find anything different in her."

Lisa put her chin upon one hand. "Some days I think we should never have told anybody about the kids. Though it's mostly okay."

She was still looking at me. "Exedore, can I ask you something?"

"You may."

Lisa looked sympathetic. "Miriya told me why you don't seem to get much older. But doesn't it bother you? You're going to outlive all of us, and Kazianna and your students, and..."

"Not me," Lantas said. "The Masters wanted their dolls to live as they did, and subjected us to the same lifespan-enhancing treatments, though no more Tirolian derivatives will ever have that same treatment, as it's banned. I don't know if Exedore and I can last that long, but I want to act as if we can."

"The same holds true for me, as well. As to everything else, I will do my duty to the best of my ability, until I expire or am relieved of it, rather than allow needless anguish to slow me."

Rick folded his hands and leaned forward. He spoke with a smirk. "Exedore, you're so enthusiastic. Does this mean you still think everybody enjoys making war?"

"Conflict _is_ inevitable Mr. Hunter, and I always keep the worst possibilities in mind so that I may prepare for them. Why would you believe my opinion on that has changed?"

Rick moved his head to one side, still trying to smirk. "What do you see in him?"

Lantas answered with, "More than you, obviously. How hard is it to understand that you can be aware of something you do not wish for?" Lantas shifted position. "It means nothing against a search for the better things."

Lantas had been angry with me about something similar, once. When I, and the archived videos, had told her about some of the things that I had said during the Malcontent Uprisings, she had not been too appalled.

But when strife between Micronian clone and natural-born had begun to emerge on Tirol, after the two aspects had fought beside each other just previous, Lantas had suddenly found an anger to go against my aged statements.

I had not ever tried to use the inevitability of war as a method of consoling her, and she had admitted that her exhumation of my past had not been her "finest hour".

Lisa was saying, "So, we're thinking of going to the Andromeda Galaxy with some of the other Sentinels, see if Protoculture met anything there."

Lantas leaned forward. "Ah. I wish that I could go with you."

"Well, why can't you?" She smiled at her.

"There's still too much to be done on Tirol. We might be achieving more opportunity parity soon. And I'm hoping to enter into formal education."

"You seem pretty smart already," Rick remarked, although he had only met with Lantas twice before this and barely spoken to her.

"It's not the same. Cabell has been a fine teacher, and I do a good amount of learning on my own, but I would like to learn through a structure, and be...participatory, as well as further my own ambitions. But I do have a lot of time, so someday I will go to other worlds, and much farther."

Into the silence, Rick said, "I've got to say Exedore, I guess you're not as straight-laced as we thought."

"What do you mean?"

He was grinning still. "You told the UEG you were going to Tirol in order to 'monitor' its development, but all the time you had a girl on the side and were sticking your nose into that planet's business. And then you go right up to your leader and said you were going to play things your own way." He grinned, perhaps "boyishly", and shook his head.

"It could not be helped. If I was a rebel it was an unintentional one: I merely made the best out of a complex situation."

"But you know why you're doing it this way, don't you?" Miriya put in, grinning.

"Yes. And I shall make no apologies for it."

--

While we were on Earth, I had to take some time to point out to the other Zentraedi the populated places they could investigate without harm, or the location of less inhabited lands where they could walk more freely. Though a diplomatic mission, it was also a sort of "field trip" for the children.

Lantas also visited several urban centres and quieter places, but the last location we had to visit was the Military Cemetery.

Rico, Bron, and Konda had been buried there because there had been no other conceivable place to put them. The monuments of many more significant players were also present, but I had never been able to discern if I considered them friends or not. Certainly well-valued comrades, but it was the trio that I had come for.

Their stones were quite small and very simple, with their full names of Rico Docel, Bron Mantes, and Konda Blomco, question marks for their birthdates, their death dates, and nothing more.

We stood together before them. Lantas stepped forward, kissed two of her fingers, and touched them to each headstone. She had also done so on a monument to the deceased Tirolian clones, killed in civil violence or by their own hands.

"I'm afraid I cannot think of much else to do." I looked down at their tombstones. "At least I, er, eventually found the cause of their deaths."

"You're saying goodbye to an old world, that's all. There's nothing else we need to do."

"I...suppose."

What would have become of them, had they lived? What would they have thought of my new direction? Of Lantas? The Zentraedi children?

I was aware that even if Zand had not killed them, they would have died in some other conflict, like the rest of our people who had remained on Earth, and had they come along on the mission, the odds were also against their survival.

But being in this location nevertheless made questions and memories return strongly. I had never been able to explain why I had come to care for the trio, when I had often found them vapid or exasperating even after making their more direct acquaintance. But it had eventually ceased to matter.

Of course it was over now. But the past could not be forgotten, as I had told Yaita. Even if the dwelling in memories was not pragmatic, I would accept that such a thing was occurring.

"For you, this is a _journey_ of memories. Everything is coming back because you must leave this place now, and no longer belong to it."

I had turned round at the first words, but Aurora emerged from behind the tree only after she had finished speaking.

She was dressed perhaps too heavily for only the mildly cold weather, in a puffed green jacket and black hat.

Lantas edged closer to me; whether out of fear or a protective impulse, I could not ever discern. "Were you following us?"

Aurora took several steps forward. "You're interesting people. You don't see me as a fragile waif to be kept at a distance. And you don't find me as unnerving as you let on; you empathize with oddness."

I said, "That is quite incorrect. I only do what needs to be done, whether it allows me to appear 'normal' or not."

Aurora tilted her head. "And that isn't the proper meaning of eccentricity? You allowed yourself to be infantilized, treated as their little doll, all because you wanted to be with them, but be with Lantas as well. You knew that Gulliver was just a novelty in Brobdingnag, and did not care."

I frowned at her assessment of my situation, for thus far I had been treated with respect.

Lantas stepped in front of me. "Well, it doesn't matter, does it? We're going to be leaving soon."

"It's all right," Aurora replied, softly. "It's not going to be forever. Especially since..." She paused, as if for dramatic effect, "We consider you both a part of our family."

_That_ was not something I had ever expected to hear. "What?"

"It's not really that surprising, Exedore. Especially since you yourself considered Miriya a distorted reflection. And you now both are bonded to non-Zentraedi. They have me and Dana, while you are childless by choice and ability--and not only to spare everyone's aesthetic sensibilities." Aurora smiled at the last statement, and then paused. "But the point is that you and Miriya have known each other for long enough for the it to mean other things than mere reflection."

Lantas' tone sharpened. "Have you been reading his mind?"

Aurora shook her head. "I can only get flickers of that, and can't always control it. I don't want to harm either of you. I do not want to cause angst over my condition, any more than I feel it. But this...even Dana believes it. 'You're like the crazy old great-uncle on my Mom's side' is what she might one day say to you."

"How did you get here?"

"I took a city transport, the same as you did, but slightly later. I'm going home now."

Aurora started off down the hill. The both of us stood there, staring.

"Well, she's _your_ relative," Lantas finally said, but gently took my elbow and lead me away to the exit. This, and her quivering tone, made her levity ring false.

"I do not think you need to be afraid of her," I said, as we walked. "Aurora seems well-meaning enough, and her deeds account for something."

"I know, I know...it just might take me a while to get used to her. Though in that, I'm going to be in good company."

"All of you are dismissed."

I felt no fear at the commotion of giants about me, and probably never would; that instinct was absent. As the children and adults all stood and left, I walked to the edge of the platform and shut off the amplifier, and then both projection screens: the small one that I manipulated, and the larger, elevated one that it fed to. I cleaned my workstation even more carefully than usual.

When the room was clear and the noise of their passage had faded, I made my way from the platform to the new catwalk which wound round the upper walls, which in turn led to stairs that brought me down at the entrance to my quarters.

These quarters were of course more of a "pit stop" than anything, quite spare in decoration and content and holding only the very basic necessities.

A scattering of stools and couches in varying sizes were also stored in this room, and would be brought out for accommodating guests of various other species. The guests would come for diplomatic discussions, and also to provide advice and building materials for the construction of hospitals, indoor orchards, different sorts of classrooms, clothing manufacturing, and other new facilities.

All of that took place on this old Contact Satellite, once used for the Zentraedi to receive food and clothing (always strictly rationed, to keep them under control) from their Tirolian masters, and now reactivated to serve a new purpose. In another room, an extensive series of monitors allowed visitors to observe Fantoma, though work was being done on surface gravitational shielding, to one day allow others to visit Fantoma directly.

I was far from anything the Humans would recognize as a formal teacher. My sessions consisted mostly of expositing on various topics while the students listened intently, but I was confident that this process was still to their benefit, and the leaders seemed to agree.

Yaita also consulted me about the inner workings of the worlds' governments and general strategies of diplomacy, though she had already learned a fair deal independently. I still did not think she had been unwise in asking for an emissary separate from the leader, and eventually she would select someone to be a proper ambassador.

Today, I shed what Lisa had teasingly called my "doll's clothes" and donned a Tirolian outfit. Or rather, it was my formerly white, blue-caped Haydonite outfit, which had modified itself according to my wishes, in order to be even more Tirolian in appearance.

My cape, although still blue in shade, was worn about the neck, instead of hanging from the now-absent shoulder guards. The bodysuit was pale purple, with gloves, belt and boots in a darker shade; the resemblance to my old Expeditionary Force uniform proved that I was unimaginative. I excluded any other emblems or decorations, save for some holding pouches on my belt.

I activated one of the communications screens, whose feed resolved itself into an image of Yaita's new office.

Her chair had once been a pilot's seat for a mining vehicle, and her desk was made from scrap metal; pushed up to its side were a set of mobile stairs, for when I had to meet with her directly.

Yaita and I got along better now, but she still seemed slightly resentful, and for the most part lacked a spirit of inquiry. Her eyes were fully on the future, intending to be as utilitarian as possible without crushing spirits. If it did not serve the Zentraedi development, she wanted to wait to explore it.

"I must take my leave now. I shall return on the next cycle."

"It's accepted. Thank you, Exedore."

I nodded and departed for my "holiday".

My shuttle, which had been made for me by the other Zentraedi, was shaped somewhat like a mobile fighter pod, though smaller. It was blue and white, and its allegiance could not be mistaken: a silhouetted silver Zentraedi emblem adorned one side.

Down below on Fantoma there was constant movement. Everyone, even the two leaders, was expected to work at everything else (only the injured Yaita would be excluded from heavy physical work; Kazianna went to it vigorously), and the Zentraedi had for the moment become a series of "jacks-of-all-trades".

Even though most adults found time to sit in on an education session or two (and there was always at least one to lend some physical authority to my presence and provide any discipline that was needed), they were very busy, searching for work opportunities, making diplomatic efforts, and raising their latest children; they were trying to be prolific, both through their own abilities, and other methods.

Despite what Lisa Hunter had written of, the Zentraedi had eventually decided to increase their numbers by artificial means. While new Zentraedi could not ever be created from scratch, we had begun to use enlarged versions of Tirolian artificial womb technology, and the genetic material of the survivors, as well as that archived from other clone lines, to supplement the population, take some strain off the females, and resolve the looming issue of genetic diversity.

But only infants would be made this way, and only at the rate that the adults could handle in the normal fashion. Some of the children born in this fashion had already shown the unnatural skin tones and minor facial deformities that had once been familiar, but there was no time or need to correct for these.

Cabell had helped in planning out these facilities, arguing successfully that by giving the roots of this technology to the Zentraedi, he was not violating the new Tirolian laws against the creation of artificial sentients, since the Zentraedi would use the technology only on their own world, and not subvert the natural growth process. There had been controversy among the Zentraedi themselves, but eventually the project had went ahead.

Drannin had also aided in the building of the local chambers, showing a precocious talent for mechanical things, though he always emphasized the use of his hands in the process.

Lantas' fears about the Zentraedi presence causing a resurgence in the hatred of artificial beings were not entirely unfounded: among the Tirolians, I had heard or received a share of fearful or obscene pronouncements. But the local movements did not return to their earlier state of affairs, and now, things had recently improved.

--

Today, Lantas sighed. "Can't they at least understand how important it still is? They can't sour this with their own lack of success."

"They shall not," I pointed out. "Their absence cannot change the facts, even if it might be better were they present."

"Mm. I would hope, at least, that they aren't petulant enough to not retake the exams when the opportunity comes up."

The presentation was not until the evening, and Lantas and I spent some time having an animated discussion about cybernetics. Louis Nichols had gotten around to publishing more of his findings, and though Lantas felt that there were still too many risks involved in cybernetic integration, she expressed interest in future possibilities.

I was a bit worried for her, remembering Gibley and his mental destruction, but I could only articulate my concerns, never hold her back.

We idly debated the effects of mechanical integration on the "soul". I did not believe in such a concept as the soul, and Lantas thought it was only a metaphor for sentience. She believed cybernetics would mean nothing to it, and I pretended that I disagreed, just to sustain the discussion.

But eventually we had to depart: the Sterlings, Bowie, and the Muses would be arriving soon.

We met them at the port. Everyone was dressed in Tirolian clothes, and the Muses had not chosen their original clone garments.

Unexpectedly, it was Bowie who first shook my hand, and asked me how I was.

"I am doing quite fine. Though my situation is complex, I will make the best of it."

"Yeah? Well, at least you're doing what you love." He looked to Lantas. "Congratulations."

"Thank you, Mr. Grant."

"Oh, you can call me Bowie."

"All right, then, Bowie. But my gratitude still stands."

"Sure." Bowie wasn't at all put off by the way Lantas sometimes spoke.

The two Muse clones walked forward and both embraced Lantas. "Hope for the future," Allegra said.

Lantas shook her head. "I'm just lucky enough that doing what I want manages to make me into a semi-palatable role model."

Max and Miriya told us more about events that had recently occurred on Earth. Lisa was well into her explorations of the Andromeda galaxy, and Bowie and Musica were planning to get married, and that led to the inevitable question:

"Are you ever going to get married?", asked by Allegra.

Lantas held up three long fingers, and folded each as she listed the point. "These are the three shallow rules of mine: no marriage, no children, and no demeaning pet names."

Allegra's eyes widened, but then she chuckled.

--

The event took place in a small basement area, now adorned with silken strands, small artworks, and banners proclaiming victory in archaic, elaborate fonts, all coloured in the simple, bold, colours of the clones' past lives.

It was already filled by the time we arrived. Though they had grown from the generic obedience favoured by the Maters, some clones were still more contained than others. Following the presumption, the scientists and scribes were the quietest, talking in lower voices and sitting down, while other groups talked more loudly, and were drinking already, even in sight of the media.

I caught sight of the Garuda-adapted clones, all of which had blank glowing eyes, hair stained green with the fungus of the planet, and required respirators.

There were introductions and re-introductions. Dana went from clone to clone, complimenting them on how much they had changed, how _individualized_ they appeared, though she did not phrase it in such direct terms.

The table was carved and dark, made of deep blue ceramics. Lantas sipped her drink, then grimaced. "Far too strong." She put it back down, fitting it into the coaster niche.

"Not many made it that high," replied young Clio; a fair natural-born Tirolian who needed a hoverchair to move. "You deserve to indulge yourself."

She shook her head. "I can't hold it well enough at the best of times, and I've got the speech to do. Besides, this is going to be remembered."

Oh, indeed, I thought.

"I hope that the Senate keeps their promise," remarked Protus, a former scribe clone, ever the pessimist when he wasn't teasing.

"But why go to all the trouble simply to snatch it away? They have faced far more pressure when the deal was only a potential."

Protus gave me a strange look. Had he not expected me to speak? But I would.

The lights were eventually turned low, making some of the phosphorous decorations glow faintly. (The white skin of the clones also seemed luminous in the dark). Not everyone took this as a signal to become more subdued, however.

The curtains drew aside, revealing, along with the more typical Human and Tirolian instruments, a torus-like device with iridescent strings spread in a fan, one that I recognized immediately. Bowie and the Muses stood before the array, and they bowed and introduced themselves.

They sang, as three or two or one, songs from various worlds, including Earth, including "We Will Win".

More musicians came on after them. I had never had much interest in music but for the symbolic importance of Minmei, but what it represented on this night was also enough to take my attention.

The deal had been that if the Tirolian clones passed exams that demonstrated their educational competence would be allowed to enter their schools, and for the most intelligent, the recently re-established Tiresian universities were also an option.

Lantas had worked hard to reach her point. Even before the possibility of being accepted into conventional schooling, she had put all her effort into a well-rounded, contemporary education, knowing exactly how far she could push herself before overexertion placed her farther behind. The end result had been that she had been judged intelligent enough to be an immediate candidate for a university-level education.

When she ascended the podium to make her speech, I clapped as loud as I was able, listening to the cheers of others.

"To be placed into a future is quite a different thing from having to contemplate it. But we do not go into this future with ignorance. We have lived through strife internal and external, the rending of the very fabric of our lives.

"But we have shown that not only were we unafraid to come into the light, but that we were also not blinded. Compared to what we have endured to reach this point, entering higher education may look like nothing.

"Yet its importance can't be underestimated. It is knowledge which let us become more than what we were, let us see that the essential force of sapience exists whether one was born from a womb or a tank. We were born to live, and we will."

"For my own part, I want to thank Cabell for being such a...good and patient mentor, and everyone here for believing in this. Especially Exedore, for always knowing that such things were possible."

A slight lie, but this would not be spoiled for her. I listened to Lantas with warmth, and when she walked back to our table, I squeezed her hand and told her, "You shall be wonderful at whatever you choose," before kissing her upon the cheek.

After this there would be more interviews, more questions. The clones would be watched with utter scrutiny, and some might break underneath it. But it had begun.

There were more speeches done in that same inspirational fashion, and even the most talkative became quiet and listened respectfully, but things loosened again when everyone was free to stand and speak to each other.

"Architecture is an art and a science," Lantas was saying to Allegra. "But I'm not going to abandon my other explorations."

"Mm. You always did have a more developed aesthetic sensibility than me," I said to Lantas, though we had acknowledged it before.

"Then how did she end up with you?" asked Sheta, a former guardian clone.

Lantas ignored the comment.

"You must be proud of her," Max remarked to Cabell.

"I am proud of all my creations," Cabell replied, graciously. But his smile drew away. "I have known for a long time that even were Lantas...natural-born, she would still have been at the age to make her own choices when she met Exedore. But...I'm afraid that I had begun to think of her in a more explicitly paternal way than most."

"It wasn't entirely unwarranted," I remarked. "There were many issues involved, ones that we did not truly understand because of our social ignorance, even though we tried to tell ourselves otherwise."

Lantas added, "And we never needed your blessing, but it wasn't as though we _enjoyed_ offending you. I'm...glad that you never wanted to destroy our friendship over this."

"How could I? But if Exedore is willing to give up his natural place for this, then obviously there is nothing to do but see it through."

Lantas: "Would this be a reconciliation?"

Cabell actually smiled. "Consider it resignation."

We all moved about and talked for hours longer. Tomorrow I would help to take the foreign visitors around Tiresia, even the Garuda-adapted clones, who had been reluctant at first, but now intended to stay for a visit longer than this night, though eventually they would leave. And perhaps Miriya would take advantage of the occasion to visit the Contact Satellite with her daughters.

No, nothing here was perfect. There were challenges yet, and by choosing to walk between worlds, I had somewhat lost face, even with my long-time Tirolian allies. But Lantas had her victory, and I had my choice: Tirol would be my home, for as long as it wanted me.

**End.**


End file.
